Me live de life of leisure in me house here down de bay
Me wife cook anyting me want, me eat six times a day
Me woman she cook de chicken, yes, she cook de beans and rice
With rum banana pudding, me livin' de life of paradise

De only consequence is dat me weigh 300 pound
And now de clothes dat fit me-Ha! Ha!-nagwah can be found
Jah know me hear de riddems, Jah know me want to dance around
But every time me take a step me pants fall down

Me gut so big and round
She make me pants fall down
Me trousers on de ground
Because me pants fall down
Me belt she loop around
And still me pants fall down
Yah hear da whooshing sound
Jah know me pants fall down

Shriekback, flashback, give de dog a bone
Jah crack way in back, John Brown on de phone

Me try de Atkins diet, cause me worry 'bout me size
Me lose de bufu inches from me bumbo and me thighs
Me wife she make de grapefruit an' de yogurt, oat and bran
She say dat though there less of me, me no de lesser man

Me like "before and after" picture since me shed me pound
Jah know me hear de riddems but Irie, she no be found
Before me clothes to little and me was too big around
And now me got no middle, so me pants fall down

Me lose de hundred pound
And still me pants fall down
Me face is going to frown
Because me pants fall down
Me walking like a clown
Because me pants fall down
Me naughty bits abound
Because me pants fall down

Shriekback, flashback, give de dog a bone
Jah crack way in back, John Brown on de phone

Shriekback, flashback, give de dog a bone
Jah crack, hacky sack, John Brown on de phone