Today is your birthday
How old are you now?
Is that rude to ask?
Just cause another year’s passed?
Are you that insecure?

I didn’t mean it that way
What are you doing to celebrate?
Are you going to go out
To some place downtown?
If you do, can I join?

I’ll call me an Uber
So I can just meet you there
Will there be lots of people?
Or do you want, a more intimate affair?
We’ll all sing Happy Birthday

Slightly out of tune
So that when it goes to the ‘Gram
The copyright claims won’t kill the whole mood
Happy Birthday to you!
Will you answer my calls?

Your voice mailbox is full
It’s gonna cut me off son
Happy Birthday to you!
I hope that today
Is the very best day
Until I next see you!